Weekly Review -- Just chillin'

Frozen (2010) -- Ah, winter. Time for Christmas, skiing, sledding, hot chocolate in front of the fireplace, getting stuck on a ski lift... oh, wait. Generally no one's idea of a good time, the latter is exactly what befalls the protagonists of Adam Green's newest venture, and yes, the outlook is grim indeed.

Three winter sports enthusiasts (Shawn Ashmore, Kevin Zegers and Emma Bell) spend a fun-filled weekend at a ski resort. Right before leaving, they decide to have another go at the slopes, but their plan quickly turns into a nightmare when they are accidentally left stranded on a ski lift, with no chance of rescue. Frightened and cold, they have to rely on their wits and each other to possibly escape, but the situation proves to be even more complicated than it initially appears...

I had thoroughly enjoyed Green's horror comedy Hatchet and was looking forward to a seemingly more primal and sobering film, with Frozen delivering on all fronts. The debacle it represents is not a zombie apocalypse that wipes humanity out or a supernatural monster on the prowl; in the vein of Open Water and The Strangers, Green's latest focuses on a relatively plausible scenario, caused by most disagreeable happenstance. There are no computer graphics, histrionic music, quick startles or any other unnecessary effects. There is painfully earnest dialogue and the occasional bout of violence that, though anticipated in the context, is somehow always unexpected in its abrupt brutality, rendering the proceedings a lofty and worthwhile investment for the audience.

The actors are relatable and understated. Newcomer Emma Bell steals the show as the spunky newbie snowboarder, while Ashmore and Zegers play off of each other nicely as best friends caught up in an event that they are unable to fathom. Hiring up-and-comers for this kind of introspective drama was a perfect casting solution, being that any huge Hollywood star would have reduced the believability factor to zero. After all, it is people like you and me that get lost in the middle of nowhere, not Anne Hathaway and Leonardo DiCaprio.

Frozen is a creepy little film that plays on the universal fears of demise and abandonment, and that exploits its themes for all they are worth. Green is aware that the most frightening situations are always borne of the most ordinary of circumstances, not of noise and fanfare. Michael, Freddy and Jason might be the figures that make us hide behind the sofa, but they are not the shadows that provoke our deepest anxieties. Real terror is concealed within the silence of a snowy night, the darkness of isolation and the knowledge that your screams cannot be heard, no matter how desperate you may become.

9/10

Weekly Review -- Low-cal western

Jonah Hex (2010) -- In the film canon, there are certain genres that can end up being representative of extremes. Either awesomely good or mind-numbingly bad, genres like horror, comedy and comic book adaptations fall into an all-or-nothing area that usually involves a point of no return. For every X2 and The Dark Knight, there is a Batman & Robin and, unfortunately, Jonah Hex is the latter type of attempt.

The title character, played by Josh Brolin, is a vengeful outlaw, who makes a deal with the U.S. military to bring to justice criminal mastermind Quentin Turnbull (John Malkovich). Turnbull had also murdered Hex's wife and child and left Hex for dead, with the help of his psychotic sidekick Burke (Michael Fassbender), and our hero cannot wait to finally get his hands on both perpetrators. Off he rides, into the sunset, on his journey of revenge and redemption...

... but the audience is hard-pressed to care. The film is an incomplete mishmash of gunfights, supernatural elements, hyper flashbacks and a tinge of a story, none of which come together in a cohesive whole. Jimmy Hayward is not an experienced enough director to take on the task of orchestrating an adaptation of this magnitude. The screenplay was written by the ubiquitous duo of Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor, those visionary auteurs that brought us such cinematic gold as Crank and Pathology; they are not up to task either, being that their work is not exactly known for subtlety and innovation, two of the things that this film could have used in spades. At a paltry 81 minutes running time, Jonah Hex feels unfinished, underdeveloped and overall neglected.

The actors are mostly better than the film, but even they are unable to elevate the material. Brolin plays Hex with more decorum than is warranted, and Malkovich sleepwalks through the role of his arch nemesis. Fassbender is having a lot of fun with the sadistically playful character of Burke, while Megan Fox is just posing as her bland self, in the cliché role of a hooker with the heart of gold. For some reason, we also get Will Arnett and Michael Shannon, both of whom swoosh through the proceedings in barely noticeable turns.

Jonah Hex is not a great way to spend an afternoon, evening or any time at all. I feel sorry for the fact that so many talented actors were wasted in this mess and that no effort whatsoever was invested into bringing a comic book legend to life with enthusiasm and creativity. Only one question remains -- where, oh where is the Dark Knight when you need him?

3/10
(for Brolin, Malkovich and Fassbender, all of whom have long earned the right to refuse this kind of dreck)